{The Birthday List} What I have learnt this year

So every year some time around my birthday I complete a list of all the things I have learnt in the last 12 months. It’s far from a comprehensive list (one would hope I learn more than 30-something things a year) but I really enjoy reminding myself how far I have come and what I have come to realise about those around me, my life and more importantly myself.

So here we go the 2017 edit:

  1. You will get a chocolate Labrador puppy who you love madly and will make your every day brighter, but she will eat your shoes.
  2. You will recover from postnatal depression but you will never be the same. Something has intrinsically changed in you forever.
  3. You will be paid actual money for writing. Some might even call you a freelance writer.buganni
  4. Your husband is a solid 10 and continues to make you a better version of yourself.
  5. She who forgets to add baking powder ends up not rising to the occasion.
  6. Your little sister will get married and it will go swimmingly – dolphins and all!
  7. The world will seem quite dark some days but your children will remind you of the sunshine.
  8. Despite the fact you have two children who sleep really well your third will not.
  9. No matter how many times you try, you still hate eggplant.
  10. You will finally convince the hubs that a Kitchenaid and a Thermomix are two very different appliances and you need both.
  11. You learn that you can’t keep expecting different reactions from the same people. Some people are just sucky.
  12. Dumplings are always a good option.
  13. Pelvic floor exercises are no longer an optional way to spend time, they are an essential element to everyday.
  14. You will go on your first cruise, get weird seasickness but love every moment and realise how important girl weekends away are.bugshayne
  15. Hangovers and children are the worst combination.
  16. You cannot please everyone.
  17. Your toddler will use sleep withdrawal as a torture method. You. Will. Survive.
  18. You will basically break your toe while walking up the aisle at your sister’s wedding. I warn you not to look to your other sisters for emotional support, they only offer laughter and sarcasm. Bennett_0509
  19. Even though you thought you had reached premium procrastination levels before, this year you will achieve a whole new skillset. Enter Youtube cute goat videos.
  20. You join the gym and actually like it. Then you get pregnant and nearly pee all the time so stop going. Just promise yourself that you will join the gym after the new baby.
  21. The kids will eat basically anything in a wrap. Keep wraps in high supply.
  22. Pregnancy is tiring. You already knew that, but this time especially.
  23. You will continue to have friends who are closer than blood ever was.
  24. Macaroni & cheese is an entire meal for three children under six.
  25. Letting go isn’t a thing you do once, it is often an action that has to happen over and over again. bugshayne2
  26. Listen to podcasts. They teach you stuff about things.
  27. Despite all the nay-sayers you do wear all seven pairs of your sunglasses on a fairly acceptable rotation system.
  28. As frustrating as studying law is, you are so much closer than this time last year.
  29. Not everything has to be perfect all of the time.
  30. You will still hide in the laundry from your children some days.
  31. Don’t say maybe when you actually want to say no. You’re only hurting yourself.
  32. The heartbreak from missing loved ones never goes away, but it does eventually change to a dull ache.
  33. Some people just let you down but you can’t fix them.
  34. Good coffee matters.
  35. People in power are not always good but the good people don’t always seek the power.
  36. For the second year in a row you will not need any moles removed. Just remember though, you are basically one big mole so don’t get too comfortable.
  37. You are enough.bugcruise

{This is life} Radio Silence

So, the battery in my car died this week. I don’t know how it happened as I refuse to admit loudly to the hubs that he was correct in assuming that I left the lights on AGAIN.

So I am awaiting the installation of a new car battery in the next few days, it has been a frustrating experience, from making sure each time I park my car the nose is pointing in the right direction in case I need a jump start through to the petrol I am using by leaving my car running for fear of it dying again! The most infuriating problem however has been the fact that the auto security on my radio has kicked in and I need a code to restart it. So, because I told the hubs I knew EXACTLY where the car book was and refuse again to admit my failings in all things car-manual-organisation I have been living in silence. Radio silence. headphones

These are the things I have learnt in a week of radio silence.

I can hear fights before they happen.

This one surprised me. Seriously. All of a sudden because I am not distracted in co-song harmony with my gal pal Taylor Swift I can hear the nigglings of a fight between the natives before it even happens. An example was the one time I heard this “Nope, nope, nope. Tis mines piglet”. This was the undeniable rumbling of fisty-cuffs in the back seat. Due to my lack of audio interference I bounced my voice through the cabin and told the kid to return the piglet to the toddler. Problem solved even before it really began.

List it.

On my morning drive to work I have been making lists in my head of all the things and jobs and stuff that I have to get done. Due to the quiet inside the car I have had time to think about paying the phone bill, cancelling the kid’s doctor’s appointment and planning what we will have for dinner. It’s funny how the background radio sound cancels out the ability to think clearly about the mundane.


In the silence I have been compiling a list of things I am grateful for. The silence has given me the ability for mindfulness. Good health, a hard working and loving husband, kids that aren’t arseholes all of the time.

Pelvic time.

When I stop at the red lights or roundabouts I now have nothing better to do than my pelvic floor exercises. I mean 3.5 kids did exactly nothing good for that situation that I look for opportunities when I can.


I call all those people I haven’t had a chance to speak with lately. For some reason my radio won’t play music but will let me utilise the Bluetooth to call. So hello grandparents, long lost friends and doctor appointments. It’s totes multitasking.

So, while it may not be ideal it certainly has made me aware that sometimes radio silence is exactly what the doctor ordered.


{The Nest Writes} Things I have learnt this year

What I have learned in one whole year.

  1. Pelvic floor confidence and three children is an either/or option.
  2. You will survive fairly severe post-natal depression. It will crush you, you won’t feel like you can breathe, let alone function. You can though. You will get through this. There will be sunshine again.
  3. Plain flour and self-raising flour have VERY different outcomes when baking.
  4. Sudocream can be removed from carpet. Over time. Long amounts of time.
  5. Even though this year marks 12 years of being with the hubs you will still love him more than you ever thought possible.
  6. You will wear studs and think that’s cool. Your sisters will openly (and very vocally) disagree.
  7. You will be nominated for blogging awards that you didn’t even know existed one year ago.
  8. Your gut is always right. Trust it.
  9. You will get a brand new niece on your birthday and she will be completely wonderful.tori
  10. You will learn how to actually, successfully cook meringue.
  11. You will dance in front of 300 odd people to raise money for cancer and not die/wee/fall over/
  12. Despite your best efforts this year a ‘sarcasm font’ still won’t exist.
  13. There will be breakups and engagements for those you love most.
  14. When the toddler advises that the baby is painting the cot with chocolate. IT IS NOT CHOCOLATE.
  15. After living the first 32 years of your life knowing no different, you will grieve for your two grandfathers this year. You will never have another birthday where they exist in the world with you.
  16. Your baby will start at daycare, and thrive.
  17. You have family members who you will no longer count as family. They say and do some completely horrific things. Let. it. go.
  18. For the first year in a long time you will not need to have any moles removed PLUS they will extend the time until you have to come back! Well, saying that you’re due now so make an appointment.
  19. Stop collecting cook books. You already have too many. You are getting out of control woman.
  20. The toddler will empty an entire container of talcum powder into the cot with the baby. Be aware, according to her this is not her fault that it snowed.party
  21. You will learn the hard lesson that not everyone in the world is good. Some people are just inherently bad and despite how much you try you won’t be able to save them.
  22. Your children will hide your phone. Often. You should look in the toy box or the bathroom bottom drawer most often.
  23. You will struggle learning to balance parenting and working. It is hard and you will cry. Really ugly cry.
  24. You will finally get back to tropical North Queensland with your lover and it will be perfect.
  25. Sometimes step back and realise good enough is enough.
  26. It the sign says electric fence. Trust the damn fence!
  27. You will compete in ROC Race and Miss Muddy and you will have an extraordinarily brilliant time.miss muddy
  28. You will fight with the toddler about going to kindy. She will not want to go because she has ‘brown hair’ and will only go if she is ‘yellow haired’ like her sister. You will win this battle.
  29. This year will be the year of ‘Netflix and chill’ and that is fun
  30. Life happens. Coffee helps.
  31. You and your firstborn will survive and triumph in kindergarten.
  32. She who cuts chillis and rubs eyes cries.
  33. Don’t do shots. You are too damn old.friends
  34. Don’t trust your tongue when it is bitter. You will probably regret it.
  35. Don’t worry so much. It will eat you up.
  36. The thermomix will be worth every goddamn cent.
  37. You will desperately miss your five year old while she is at school. Like deeply. More than you can even imagine.
  38. The world will change this year. It will become subtly darker due to terrorism and fear mongering. You are fully capable of being shiny happy though. Don’t let the baddies win.
  39. I am proud of you.bug