{The Nester Opinion} An open letter to the lady at the gym this afternoon

This is an open letter prepared by one of our nesters regarding an incident that happened to her recently at her local gym.

Sometimes it is really important to consider what others might be going through before jumping to conclusions. letter

A open letter to the woman in the gym this afternoon/evening who reported me for having my male child in the female bathroom.

Tonight madam you reported my Son to management as you felt ‘threatened’ by him in the female bathroom. Firstly let me give you some facts.

My Son his name is Lukas. He is 10 but he is a tall boy. He cannot go to the bathroom by himself because he is incontinent. That means he cannot control his bodily functions in the toilet as you and I do Lukas has a condition called autism. Not only is he on the ASD spectrum he is severely hypermobile. He has difficulty with fine motor skills like tying his pants and shoes and sensory processing disorder. He cannot stand to wipe his own bottom nor feel water on his face and ears.

This afternoon was his second lesson at the gym for his second term of swimming lessons. Yes we have only recently started because Lukas doesn’t like getting his face wet.

Yet Lukas is doing well he is swimming well with a kickboard and doing backstroke. He likes his instructor her name is Anneke. I like her too. She knows Lukas has autism she treats with him with understanding and kindness and doesn’t judge him.

Now you know about Lukas let me give you some more facts.

My name is Jodie. I am a Mum of 2 children, yes I have a Daughter too she was at the gym with me too.

I was dressing her while Lukas ‘threatened’ you. He stepped away from me briefly as I dressed his sister and how he threatened you was via a smile.

I saw him. Continue reading

{This is life} 11 things never to say to parents of a child with autism (and what you should say)

Sometimes finding the right thing to say can be hard.

Harder still is finding the right thing to say to a parent of a child who has autism.

You try and say ‘the right things’. You somehow end up with a massive case of foot in mouth.

The thoughtful Karen Siff Exkorn has put together a list of ’11 things never to say to parents of a child with autism’.

Karen Siff
Just read it. Note it. Remember it.